Tuesday, November 30, 2010

How Much Space Do You Need in a Good Relationship?

The amount of space you may or may not need in a relationship depends on you and also the kind of relationship it is.  We know that some people thrive better when they get a lot of space in their relationship whereas others do better when they are around their partner all the time.

It sometimes becomes a challenge to find that happy medium when it comes to the amount of space each partner needs.  It gets even more cumbersome when each person has a different philosophy about what "space" is and what being together should be like.  But this mental challenge can be conquered if you both can make compromises on the amount of space you each need.

Many people simply do not want to be alone very often.  These people seem happier when they spend the bulk of their time with their partner, friends or family.  These types feel too lonely when they are left alone and prefer to have companionship around as often as possible.  They don’t enjoy being home alone in a quiet house!

On the opposite end you have people who enjoy alone time as much as together time.  They need their space more often and some amount of alone time each day to feel happier.  These types of people feel like tension keeps building up if they don’t get their alone time.  They may feel they have to always be at their best when people are around so they can't relax and just be themselves.  This gets exhausting to them.

Between the two extremes are most people who enjoy time with their partners but need a little free time on their own, on occasion, to reset their brain and feel like they can get away from constantly being around others.  Most people need some amount of "me" time.

A relationship may be easier if you are both between the two extremes and you can compromise about when space is needed and when it is not.  Couples who fall in the same extreme category of needing a lot of alone time or needing more together time can also have a good relationship since they understand each other easier.

The hardest relationships are when partners fall into the opposite extremes and end up with constant tension from it.  If you or your partner needs more alone time than the other needs you will have to discuss how to set up boundaries. Each of you will need to understand what the other person wants and make compromises to accommodate each other.  You both deserve to feel your needs are being met in order to have a good relationship.

If your partner seems to need company constantly but you need some alone time, then you will feel smothered by them if they constantly are hanging around you. You may also feel they don’t trust what you are doing when they aren’t around.  The more smothered you feel the more tense your relationship will get.

If your partner wants alone time but you would rather hang around them constantly then you will feel neglected when they go off alone and look for some "me" time.  You will begin to wonder if they still love you or why they need to be alone.

Both situations will cause stress on a relationship.  But it can be overcome if you explain to each other your differences in needs.  Explain that it doesn't mean you don’t love the other person but merely that you need things they don't, to feel happier.  Be honest and open early in the relationship and willing to compromise.

Read more: http://www.articlesbase.com/breakup-articles/how-much-space-do-you-need-in-a-good-relationship-1061321.html#ixzz16m143WWO 

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